Flame
by xXChantallXx
Summary: Chana Kurokawa lived in District 79 of West Rukon her family, who made life in the terrible district seem happier. But after a tragedy strikes Chana, she enters the Soul Reaper Academy. What happens is different than she could have ever expected.
1. Chapter 1

Hey everyone! I will be updating this story as often as I can, so if I don't feel free to comment or send me a message and I'll let you know when I am expecting to be done. Hope you like my story!

-Few things to know before you read-

Chana is pronounced "Shahhna" in case you wanted to know.

This still happens in the same universe as the anime except there are 14 squads instead of 13.

*I use English dub terms in this story, unless I get a lot of reviews telling me they want the Japanese terms, I won't change it. So go write them reviews! ;D

 **Disclaimer: I do not own anything that has to do with the Bleach anime or manga. I do not own Bleach the events or the characters I include in my story that are from the anime.**

 **CHAPTER 1: That night…**

My name is Chana Kurokawa. I am a Soul Reaper. This is my story.

I grew up in District 79 of West Rukon. I was there for many years with my family. I had a mom and a dad, two brothers and a little sister. We were so happy there, even with the terrible conditions. We didn't have much food, but we managed.

Since I came to the soul society at 10 years of age, I was the oldest child. So, I often took my brothers out to play in the woods or in town. We got in trouble often, but it was always fun. I loved my family so much, even though they weren't my real one.

One day, I brought my brothers into town to steal some food from a vendor. The easiest one to snatch some food from was an old man selling fish on an empty street. He wasn't located far from our makeshift hut we called home.

The three of us waited around the corner, spying on the old grump. He didn't have any business, the main reason because most people didn't need food in the soul society. I had very high Reiatsu, much more than my family did, so I often was given most of the food.

While deep in my thoughts, I noticed a young woman walking up to the fish stand. It was time to make our move. We ran across the wall, hoping the man we were running towards wouldn't see us before we snatched his products.

I managed to grab a couple fish from beside him and started running, assuming my brothers were right behind me. When I turned the corner, I saw my youngest brother, Rin, turn behind me. But my other brother, Akio, wasn't with him.

"Where's Akio?" I asked in panic. Rin shrugged and I quickly jerked myself around the corner to see Akio with a blade against his throat. The old man was going to slit the throat of my brother.

Before I knew what I was doing, I rushed towards them. The vendor and I made eye contact. I shivered, then burned with anger. He was not going to hurt my brother. I wouldn't let him.

"Leave him alone!" I said reaching out towards him. I grabbed the man's arm and he quickly jerked it back. He looked at me strangely.

"You burned my arm bitch!" He said. He charged at me with the knife and I narrowly dodged it. I was shocked. I looked back at my brothers, they trembled in fear.

"Go!" I cried. I saw the two boys run, I didn't blame them for leaving me. In the Rukon District, everyone put themselves first. It was everyone for themselves. That's the way we lived.

The vendor wrapped his arm around my neck. He was going to break it.

"How do you feel now? Huh? What's it like, knowing you are going to die?" I felt wetness on my head. He spat on me. I was enraged.

I lifted my leg and kicked his balls. He let go of me in pain, and stepped back a few steps whimpering. He fell to the ground. I grabbed an armful of fish, and ran.

* * *

"Chana!" Akio yelled, a smile across his small face, as I walked into our home. His little feet scurried across the ground. He jumped up and hugged me.

"Hey guys," I said. I dropped the fish on the table "I guess we all get our own fish tonight!"

I went outside to go light a fire. The sun was setting. The soul society was starting to fall asleep. I looked to my left. Our home was at the top of a hill so I would always look out and see the tall Seireitei peeking out from behind the other districts. I often wondered what it was like in the Seireitei. They always had food. They had strong shelter. They had purpose. We had no reason to live. We just stole every day, to keep our meaningless existence alive. We were worthless in the end.

"Chaa" said a voice behind me. It was my litter sister, Kiyoko. Her long black hair almost reached her feet now. She died 5 years of age and had recently come to the Soul Society. We adopted her into our family three weeks earlier.

"Hi Kiyoko, did you have fun with mommy and daddy today?" I asked, crouching down to her level.

"Yaa, we pwayed by the stream! There were fishes!" She said. I could see the twinkle of excitement in her eyes. She was everything to me since we first met. I decided I would do anything to keep her safe.

In total, my family consisted of six. Myself, Kiyoko, Akio, Rin and our parents, Ayaka and Kenta. We had all decided to take on the last name "Kurokawa". This was about a year ago, when I came to the Soul Society.

The fire started warming up the area around it. I could feel the flames like blankets on my skin. They felt comfortable. I stared at them, I was drawn to the warm light that blew in front of my eyes.

"Chana," a voice called, "Have you started cooking the fish yet?"

"Oh, ya I'm putting it on the fire now!" I replied. Kiyoko had disappeared, she must have gone inside when I wasn't watching. I placed four fish on some wooden sticks we collected. I stuck the wooden ends into the ground, pointing the fish into the fire.

I looked back into our home, everyone was laughing. Rin and Akio were yelling at each other, Rin pointing a finger at Akio. Kiyoko and our parents giggled at the sight. I smiled. This was what I loved about my family. We could still have a good time, even while being so poor.

I could see the moon coming up from behind the forest that surrounded our home. The bright white glow lit up the now dark sky. The rays reflected off the leaves like little mirrors. The light danced around me. I felt so calm that night.

A breeze whistled through the trees. The fire rustled. One of the fish fell over. I quickly brushed off the side and propped it back up. We could not waste anything.

I looked closely at the fire. I could see sparks flying to the side every so often, then disappearing in to the ground. The skin of the fish slowly started to turn brown. I watched as one turned a deep shade of black.

A gust ran through the area once more. This time, one of the fish fell forward, directly into the blazing flames. I panicked as the golden bush of light slowly engulfed the food. Without thinking I reached out into the flames to retrieve it.

I expected a sharp pain and my hand burned to ashes. But, the warmth felt comforting. It slowly danced around my hand, flowing around it like water. I quickly screamed and the flames snapped. My hand was burned on the edges.

I had always been attracted to fire, it has always been there, even though I had never noticed before now. I had a connection with the flames, like they were trying to tell me something. I picked up the end of the stick, peeling the charred fish out of the fire. I knew that one was cooked through.

Pulling the other sticks out of the ground, I could feel another breeze passing through. This was quite a windy evening. I left the fire to set the fish inside. As I walked towards the empty space we called a door, I picked up the small pail we found one day a few months ago.

I made my way over to the stream near the edge of the forest. It had come in handy many times before when we had to put out campfires. I crouched down and placed the pail in the water. It slowly filled up with water.

I walked back over to the glowing fire and poured the water on top. The blazing flames. I watched them bubble to ashes. All that were left was some warm ashes, dimly glowing then turning white.

I carried the bucket inside and placed it by the door when I found it. I sat at the table, which rested so low we all sat on the floor every night. Everyone had taken a fish, of course I was left with the burnt one. A smile cracked onto my face. I didn't mind getting the worst one, I was glad everyone else got a good piece.

"Hey Chana, so when will you join the soul reaper academy, huh?" I jerked my head up. My father was always asking me that.

"I'm not going to." I replied, my head sinking down again. My eyes met the black fish once again.

"Why not Chana? You have a lot of spiritual energy! You'd be great!" Rin said, jumping into the conversation.

"I just don't want to…" I said. To be honest, I was scared of dying. I was scared of getting hurt and dying in battle. I was scared of not being good enough to fight.

"Chana, think of the way you'd be able to live there! You would get the food you need, you will have amazing shelter. It would be so much better for you, you deserve it!" my father said. He would never let this go, no matter how much I told him I wouldn't go.

"I won't do it." I said, "Besides, I can't leave you here to fend for yourselves. How would you get food?"

I put on a fake happy act when saying that. This conversation always made me feel uncomfortable. I was too scared of the 14 Court Guard Squads. The people, the Seireitei, they all seemed so different.

"Alright, if you say so." father sighed. He had given up for the day.

* * *

We finished eating. For once, we weren't hungry. We went to bed full, for probably the first time since we all met. I went outside to douse the fire with water once more, to make sure it wouldn't start burning again while we were sleeping.

I crouched down once more, scooping up the glass-like water into the bucket. I heaved it over to the stone circle. I could still see small cracks of light glowing in the heap of white ash. I poured the cool liquid into the circle. I noticed some drops trickling out between the small stones. The water spread out from the fire, wetting the grass around my bare feet.

"Hey Chana, you should go to bed." said a voice, my father's voice.

"Alright father, I'll see you in the morning then." I held the handle in both my hands and slowly walked past him.

"You should really become a soul reaper." He said. I stopped. Here we went again.

"I'm being really serious this time. Soon, we won't have enough food to keep you alive. The rest of us can live without any food for months and we won't even feel the effect. You deserve better. Don't worry about us, I mean it. We all want you to go."

"I… I just don't want to…"

"Don't be scared Chana. Don't be afraid of dying. You are a strong girl. You would make a fine Soul Reaper, my little girl."

I walked away, clutching the bucket. I could feel tears trying to break free. I didn't want to leave my family, I didn't want to leave them…

I slowly laid down on the ground. I could see Kiyoko on the other side of the room, her face so peaceful in her deep sleep. I remember her small torn pink dress, and her long black hair that stretched across the ground that night. I remember it as clearly as the day I decided to become a Soul Reaper.

* * *

Coughing. The coughing woke me up. As my eyes peeled open, a bright light blinded me. I thought it was the daylight. I was mistaken. I wish I wasn't mistaken that day…


	2. Chapter 2

Hey guys! Thank you so much for reading my story! I'm actually surprised I got some views! Thank you for supporting me! :P xD

If I make any mistakes in who has what seat/ rank at the time let me know and I'll change it. Also, feel free to post suggestions or just a plain old comment telling me what you think! They are very helpful x)

 **Chapter 2: The Loss of Everything**

"Don't be scared Chana. Don't be afraid of dying. You are a strong girl. You would make a fine Soul Reaper, my little girl."

I walked away, clutching the bucket. I could feel tears trying to break free. I didn't want to leave my family, I didn't want to leave them…

* * *

"Who are you?" My voice echoed through the room. The woman stayed quiet. Her back faced me. I couldn't see her face.

"I said who are you, what is this place?" I asked. She still didn't answer me. The room we were in looked like a Japanese dojo. The walls were sturdy, the floor didn't leave cracks. My bare feet weren't cold.

"Why won't you answer me?" I asked, growing impatient. The woman stood up, back still facing me. Her orange and red flowery kimono flowed to the ground. I saw a sliver of her face, only the corner of her lips. She whispered something. Fire engulfed me.

* * *

"Cough, cough"

A faint sound woke me up.

"Cough, cough"

I tried opening my eyes.

"Cough, cough"

A bright light blinded me.

"Cough, cough"

I pushed myself up and peeled my eyes open slowly, thinking it was morning. When my eyes opened, I screamed.

"Chaa…" Kiyoko mumbled, barely getting her words out, "Hewp, pwease…"

I looked around. A giant block of wood that was once part of the wall had collapsed on my mother and father, blood was spilling out from their backs. They laid there, motionless on the ground. The area where Akio and Rin were sleeping was a giant pile of glowing rubble.

Heat surrounded us. I tried to climb over the table to reach Kiyoko. Her small hand reached out to me. I grabbed it and tried to pick her up when I realized her leg was caught under a wooden beam.

"Chaa, pwease help mwe." Tears started running down her cheeks. I quickly reached over her to the chunk of wood crushing her. I could feel tears welling up in my eyes. My family was gone. My mom, dad, brothers… They were gone. I needed to save Kiyoko.

I lifted the wood off of her with one arm and barely pulled her out before my arm collapsed from the weight. I carried Kiyoko outside by the river. I rested her down and saw her leg. It was bleeding out. She would soon die from blood loss.

"Chaa, it hurts…" Kiyoko whispered, her voice becoming fainter and fainter.

"Don't worry Kiyoko, try and ignore it. You will be fine" I lied.

"Chaa, can you sing for mwe?" she asked, barely being able to make out the words.

"Yes of course…" I could hardly see, my eyes were filled with tears. I started singing a small lullaby that everyone in our district knew.

 _The moon shines on the quiet stream._

 _The water flows away._

 _The wind blows through the trees._

 _The night is now the day._

 _So hush, little child,_

 _Don't fear._

 _The night will keep you safe._

 _So close your eyes._

 _And sleep tight._

 _And await another day…_

Kiyoko had closed her eyes. She was gone. A tear fell down my face and dropped onto her dress. I broke. I started bawling. Everything I loved was gone. Everything I ever cared about was gone, I was alone. I was alone…

Tears flooded my eyes, I couldn't see anything. I turned to look back at the house and saw a giant blur of light. I rubbed my eyes and looked up again, imagining my house being a giant mass of fire. But, when I looked up, I went stiff. I couldn't move, couldn't talk, I could hardly breathe.

The whole town was on fire.

I fell to my knees. I was in shock. Not only my family, but even the whole district could have been affected. Everyone, even the old fish vendor, could have been dead. The thought paralyzed my body.

I felt sick, like a hole was carved into my stomach. I started feeling dizzy. Panic filled me. I felt like I was suffocating. I saw a figure emerge from the flames. I slowly fell to the ground and everything went black.

* * *

I jerked myself up. I looked around. I wasn't in my home, I was somewhere else. It looked like the middle of the district, but I had only been there once so I wouldn't remember. I was lying on a blanket, with another blanket on top of me. I never had a blanket before, so something was definitely different.

I looked around. _How did I get here?_ I thought to myself, I stood up and walked down the street. I heard sudden footsteps from around the corner of a building. Three soul reapers ran by. My eyes widened and they flew past me.

"So you're awake" said a deep chilling voice from behind me. I was stunned by it. Fear welled up inside me once more as I turned around.

The man standing behind me was old. He had a long grey beard with a purple ribbon tying it together and no hair on his head. He was holding a wooden cane with a large circular handle and wore a soul reaper uniform. And a Captain's Haori. His eyes were small, but they pierced into me like he was trying to stab my soul. I was scared of this man.

"Do not be afraid." He said, his loud voice booming and surrounding me.

"Wh… Who are you?" I asked.

"I am Head Captain of the Thirteen Court Guard Squads, Genryusai Shigekuni Yamamoto."

"H… Head Captain..?" I stuttered in shock, what was he doing here? Why would the Head Captain come to such a terrible district?

My memories of last night came flooding back, drowning my thoughts with pain. I had lost everything, my whole family…

Kiyoko.

I ran. I ran down the street, my bare feet getting cut by sharp rocks and pieces of wood that had been tossed aside. I didn't care. I needed to find Kiyoko. I thought maybe she was alive, maybe she didn't die.

I turned the corner and stopped. I stood silently. I couldn't believe the sight before me. It couldn't have happened…

"I didn't mean for you to see this yet. But I guess I have no other choice, I must to explain this now." Said Yamamoto who had caught up to me.

I felt tears forming once again. I wanted this to be a dream. I didn't want to accept this reality. What I didn't know was that everything was going to become much worse…

* * *

"What is your name?" Yamamoto asked after we both sat down inside a building.

"I'm Chana… Kurokawa." I told him timidly.

"Well, Kurokawa. Do you know what happened?" He asked, his voice becoming softer.

"There was a fire…"

"Do you know how big the fire was?"

"I saw it covering the part of the town I could see by the river. I'm not exactly sure how big it was though."

A pause blew through the room. It was all silent. Even the two soul reapers that were standing behind Yamamoto didn't make a sound. All they did was look down like they were regretting what was about to be said.

"The flames burnt down over half the district." He said sternly.

Another pause commenced. I was once again shocked. I felt my body freeze like it had been over and over since the evening before.

"The only survivor, was you child."

I still couldn't move. The suffocation I felt that night struck me again. This time it felt like someone was gripping my lungs. I wanted to cry again, I wanted this all to end.

"Lieutenant Kotetsu, please calm her down." Yamamoto ordered.

"Yes sir." One of the soul reapers present in the room said. She walked over to me and placed her hand on my shoulder. I looked up at her and she smiled. She put her hands out, pointing at me. A blue light appeared. I slowly started to feel safer and my panic was dissipating.

"Now, let us continue. Do you know the cause of the fire?" I shook my head at his question. He nodded at the woman he called "Kotetsu". She bent down beside me and created another blue light.

"The cause of the fire was you."


	3. Chapter 3

Hello everyone! If you want to follow my Instagram, it's xxchantallllxx. I will post updated for new chapters there and will take suggestions there in addition to the fanfiction reviews. ;D Chapters will start to be posted less after a while because I am getting pretty busy. I would really appreciate your patience x) Thank you so much guys!

 **Chapter 3: Stones to remember**

"Me..?"

"Yes. You caused the fire." He said, staring into my eyes.

"How… How do you know it's my fault?" I asked, tears forming in my eyes for what felt like the millionth time, "What makes you think I did this?"

I wasn't only sad or scared anymore. I felt rage burning inside me. How could they blame me? How could they accuse me of killing my family? Why was this happening to me?

"Have you ever felt connected to flames? Have you ever had the feeling that they were reaching out to you?"

I was stunned once again. It was like I was going through and endless cycle. Being so shocked I can't breathe then calming down. Over and over. This day was a constant cycle of fear, shock and sadness. I was breaking.

"Yes, I have." I said. I looked down to my hands. They were shaking. I couldn't stop them. I couldn't stop thinking about the fact that this could have been my fault. That I could have killed my family…

"Then this means you have, in fact, caused this tragedy. Your spiritual energy isn't being controlled properly."

"What are you saying..?" I asked. A tear fell onto my hand and dripped onto my torn beige dress.

"You need to learn to control your spirit energy or else, this will happen again. It will continue happening until you can control it. You need to become a soul reaper."

I stayed silent, processing what was happening. My family always told me I needed to be a soul reaper, but I didn't listen… The reason I killed them was… because I didn't listen. This is what I deserved for thinking of myself, for not listening to others… I deserve this…

"I will await your decision." Yamamoto said, standing up and walking outside with the two other soul reapers. I was left alone.

"This can't be…" I whispered. I fell to the ground, tears uncontrollably flowing down my face, creating a puddle on the rough beat-up floor. The sharp edges cut the side of my head when I fell to my side. Blood started trickling and flowed into the wet puddle.

"No…" I bawled, "No! This isn't happening!" I could have sworn I heard footsteps speed up outside. People scurried past the building I laid in. They didn't want to hear my sobs. They didn't want to be associated with me. They didn't care about what I was feeling. I was all alone…

* * *

I wandered around the district for four days. All the soul reapers had cleared out after the second day. The 79th District of West Rukon, called Dakuhiru, was an empty wasteland filled with scorched planks of wood and ashes occasionally blowing up into the air like sand in a desert. Only a few buildings remained.

A chill wind blew across the empty area, almost pushing me over in my emotionally weakened state. I felt like dying. I felt like I deserved to die. I killed so many people and I was the one to survive. I had never done anything to deserve life, even before this tragedy. I was a despicable child who stole every day for my own gain. I was better off dead.

I walked for a while, cutting my feet on the sharp edges of wood. I didn't care. I eventually made it to the place I was trying to avoid. The place I used to be happy, safe. I stood on top of my home. The rubble grabbing onto my feet, pulling out the memories I was trying so hard to keep buried within my soul.

I looked to the side, I could almost see Akio, Rin, mother, father… Kiyoko. I looked up to where I left her, only a small distance from our home. She was gone, she must have disappeared into the sky like all souls did.

I stepped over the splinters and made my way slowly to the spot where I laid Kiyoko to rest. I took staggered steps until my legs gave out and I fell down to where I last saw my sister. I traced my hands against the faint outline of her in the sand.

I pushed myself up to my knees and looked at the dirt. The flowing stream water sounded like a million small creatures running across the land. I took a deep breath and pushed my ever flowing tears away. I collected myself and stood up.

"I'm sorry everyone." I said quietly. I noticed some large rocks on the other side of the river. They would be perfect. For the next three days, I heaved the large rocks to where I last saw the final member of my family. On the first day, I could only gather the strength to carry one across the water. My small arms could hardly hold the large stones, they were almost half the size of my small ten year old body. My legs bucked under me after each step.

I was weak at that time. I never had the chance to exercise. It was the same for almost everyone in the district. We were all barely getting by. Almost no one had the chance to commit to fitness or anything of the sort.

I collapsed after I dropped the rock. I could see the sun setting beside me. I closed my eyes and slowly fell asleep in the open, the cool water flowing by my head, the rock on the other side of my body.

* * *

"It's you again. Who are you?" I said, looking at the woman in the red kimono. Her black hair was tied up by a red piece of rope in the shape of a bow.

"Who are you, I need to know!" I said, becoming impatient, "Please tell me…"

The woman turned around. Her eyes were black as the night sky, her face flawless. She held red hilted sword with a perfect silver blade. She held the sword in front of her and I could see her mouth moving, she was whispering again.

"What are you saying? I can't hear you!" I yelled, but it was too late. Fire engulfed me and blocked my vision.

* * *

I opened my eyes. The sun was peeking out from behind the trees once again and filled the barren area. I had that dream again. That dream I had that night, the dream I feared and hated because of the memory of the first night I had it. Since then, I experienced it every night, every bright flame like a knife wound revealing more and more memories of that night that I dismissed.

I stood up, brushed myself off and continued my mission to move the rocks. I stepped into the river, the cool liquid easing the pain on my feet. I took a couple steps and walked onto the dead grass, killed by the fire. The forest was lucky to survive.

The pile of rocks was only tucked a bit behind the first row of trees. There were over ten there, so it wouldn't change much if I took a few. I heaved a smaller one into my arms and walked step by step across the river and beside the other. This one was a bit taller but less wide. It was almost the exact same size as me.

I ran into the stream and jumped out on the other side and made my way back into the lush green woods. I picked up yet again another stone and walked through the river.

There were tiny rocks in the stream. I slipped on one. The rock I was holding was thrown to the side. I was lucky it didn't land on top of me. If it did, I would have suffered from broken bones and I could have drowned. Luckily, all I had was a headache.

I tried lifting the rock again with no luck. My feet couldn't stay put on the slippery ground. I gave up on the rock and went back to get another. By the end of the day, a line of five large rocks lined the stream. One for each person I cared about. For each person I cherished so dearly before they were taken away from this world.

The sun disappeared once more and I laid down beside the wall of rocks. I looked up at the stars appearing in the darkening sky.

"Father, you were right. You were all right," I said, tears appearing for the last time, "I will become a soul reaper, for all five of you."


	4. Chapter 4

OMG I have over 200 views I'm so happy XDDDDD! I never expected this x) Thank you all so much! :3 And for those of you who like romance, it is coming! Don't worry. ;D Thank you all for sticking with me! Also, please post some reviews if you can, it will help me make the story even better!

*BEFORE READING*

As will be seen in this chapter, the time this part of the story takes place in is the time when Rukia, Renji, Momo etc. are in their first Academy year, about 50ish years from the main storyline. Also, Toshiro would be a bit older (not looking or acting any different :) ) than he is portrayed in the anime at the point in time this story would take place. ;P

 **Chapter 4: The Meeting**

"Your decision is quite favorable. You are now accepted into the Soul Reaper Academy!" Yamamoto looked down at my small ten-year old body.

"Thank you sir but, don't I need to take a test or something?" I asked, confused.

"You have been excused from the entrance exam." He stated, his deep voice booming throughout the room, "If you failed the exam and went back to the Rukongai, you might have destroyed even more peaceful districts and that would have been a worse outcome."

"Thank you sir." I said, bowing. I was happy and excited about being accepted right away but, the part about burning down peaceful districts worried me. Everything was happening so fast…

* * *

"Goodbye, everyone…" I said, looking at the stones, "I will never forget you guys."

I turned and walked away, leaving my life behind. I didn't know when or even if I would be able to go back. I treated that like my final farewell to my family. I started my journey to the Academy. My home was on the far edge of the district so, I had a very long way to go.

It took me a total of eighteen days to make it. I only slept thirteen times. As I passed through the districts, the buildings became sturdier and eventually, people wore shoes and their clothes looked well made. They wore real kimonos, all colours I could imagine.

One night, I realized I hadn't slept for almost a day and decided to rest in a small alley between houses. I didn't know which district I was in so, I sat in the far back end of the alley and watched the people go by, hoping they wouldn't hurt me. Some wore bright flowery kimonos, children ran and laughed, adults actually spoke to each other in happy conversation. People in my district would try to kill each other before talking. I didn't even know any other children.

I started closing my eyes, letting the laughter and chatter of the people put me to sleep. It was nice not to hear screaming before bed. I felt safe here. I didn't fear anything. I was safer now.

"Hey, are you alright?" I opened my eyes to see an old woman in front of me. I quickly scurried into a corner, "Don't be afraid. I won't hurt you."

No one had ever said that to me before. Everyone wanted to see bloodshed and pain back home. She put out her hand and I slowly extended mine to reach hers. She pulled me up gently, I kept my guard up. I still didn't know where I was.

"What is your name?" she asked when I got up. I stayed silent, I didn't know if people knew what I did. I didn't want anyone to know…

"Alright you don't have to tell me. How about we go get you something to eat? You look like you are starving." I nodded and followed the woman.

She led me through the crowd, people looked at me like I was an alien, which, in a way, was true. My clothes were torn, I wore nothing on my swollen feet and my hair was probably a mess. I had been walking for days, I probably looked even worse than I ever had.

I quietly followed the old woman, trying not to draw attention. Lights illuminated the street, lively food stands and perfectly shaped buildings lined it. I was in a totally different world than before. I felt safe in this place, even though I was being constantly stared at. I felt like I could trust the woman leading me.

We eventually reached a house. She opened the door and signaled me to enter. It was a very nice room, the smooth wooden floors felt soothing on my cut up and splintered feet. She pointed at the ground and I sat down.

I was amazed at the difference between my home and this one. This place was heaven compared to my district. 79 was dangerous, this district was how life should be like everywhere. I smiled for the first time since my journey started. Things were actually looking up.

The woman brought me a bowl of something I had never seen before. It was liquid, like water and had long strings I had never heard of.

"It's soup." She said, handing me two sticks, "You use the chopsticks to pick up the noodles."

I didn't understand what she meant. I had never seen either of these things before. We always just ate fish off the stick. We never used anything to eat it.

The woman sat down, took the "chopsticks" she gave me and demonstrated how to hold them. It looked easy enough to do. I nodded in response. Then, she dipped them into the bowl and held some of the strings between the two sticks. She dropped the food back into the bowl and handed me the chopsticks.

After a few tries and instruction from the lady, I was able to pick up some of the "noodles" as she called it. I opened my mouth to eat them. They tasted different than anything I tasted. They were good.

"Thank you." I said before taking another bite.

"You're welcome." She said, smiling once again.

We stayed silent until I finished the soup. I had never eaten so much, now even the fish that night compared to this. I felt energized for the first time in a while. I thanked her again. She nodded and took my bowl over to a table in the corner.

"Where am I?" I asked when she sat back down, "I mean which district."

"This is district one, I thought you were from somewhere else." She said in a humble tone, "Where are you from?"

"I'd rather not say…" I told her, worried she might kick me out if she knew I was the one who burned the district down. She nodded. Her face still calm.

"Would you like to stay the night?" she asked. I looked up at her and nodded.

"If it's not too much trouble…"

She nodded once more and got up. Her feet shuffled to another room. I stayed put, not wanting to go somewhere I wasn't supposed to. My hands were all cracked, skin peeling off the edges. There were a few cuts I was sure were infected. I was really beat up, cuts were everywhere, I was exhausted…

"Grandma, I'm ba…" A boy said, walking in the door. He had bright silver hair and turquoise eyes. He looked at me, our eyes met for a moment. The world felt like it stopped. I could feel my face heating up, like ashes from a fire.

"Welcome back Toshiro." Said the old lady, walking back into the room.

"Who is this?" He asked, looking at me once again. I quickly looked away in fear of blushing again. My hair fell beside my face, covering my view of him beside me.

"This is our guest. She will be staying with us tonight." The lady said.

"Oh… Alright…" I heard him say. I could hear him walking behind me. I clenched my hands. There was another person here. Another person I had to be careful around.

The boy sat down near me, facing the same way I was. There was a bit of a distance between us but, I could feel my cheeks brightening. I tried looking downwards more to cover my embarrassed face. The only boys I had ever been around were family. I had never been near anyone else, especially a kid.

"Do you mind telling us your name now?" the woman asked.

"You let her in here without even knowing her name?" Toshiro yelled beside me. My eyes widened in surprise. I looked over at him for a moment. His bright hair glistened in the light. I quickly looked down again.

"My name… is Chana" I said quietly.

"That's a nice name." the lady said, "You seem far from home, what are you doing here?"

I immediately jolted my head up and stared at her.

"I came to be a soul reaper!" I stated. I could see both the lady and Toshiro staring at me. I didn't care this time. I was determined to be a soul reaper, no matter what they thought.

"Well, that sounds nice. But, aren't you a little young to be a soul reaper dear? You seem to be about the same age as Toshiro but, he can't join yet…"

I didn't think about that. Yamamoto said I needed to become one, so I assumed I would be able to apply…

"Um… Well… it's a bit complicated… I guess…" I said. I hoped I didn't come all this way to have to be sent back… I couldn't go back there, it would be too painful. Especially if I would have had to wait years to join. The woman nodded once more and stood up.

"Toshiro, would you mind setting up a bed for Chana in the other room?" She asked, her voice a quiet whisper. She never talked very loud, at some times, I couldn't make out what she was saying. Toshiro nodded and walked to the room the woman went in earlier.

I hadn't moved an inch since I arrived. My legs were getting numb, it felt like a million pine needles were stabbing my feet. But I didn't move. I didn't want to disturb them. I wanted to be as small as possible, I didn't want to be a burden.

"Would you like a change of clothes dear?" The lady asked. I nodded slightly, hoping she wouldn't notice my desire for it. I could hear a faint chuckle as she disappeared through the doorway to where Toshiro was. A few minutes later, she returned with a pure white kimono. The fabric looked stronger than I had ever seen in district 79, even from afar. She handed it to me. The soft material draped over my arms like the water from a stream. Like the stream at home…

I was directed to the second room. The house only consisted of two. When I entered, Toshiro was laying out a futon on the ground. He looked at me and his expression changed.

"You know, just because granny is letting you stay here doesn't mean I want you to. Ugly urchin." He said.

I looked down at the white kimono. I nodded and stood there, not saying a word.

"Are you crying?" He asked.

"Of course not! I don't cry anymore stupid brat! I'm not a kid like you!" I yelled back.

"Why are you calling a stupid brat, ugly urchin!"

"Don't call me that! I've done nothing to you! I've lost my whole family and home and all you can do is call me names!" I yelled, he was so annoying. How dare he call me an ugly urchin!

"What do you mean lost?"

I realized my mistake. I could feel my face changing colour again. I quickly turned around, fighting back the urge to cry, all my memories were flooding back like a stampede of wild animals. Each one representing an element of my painful past. But, I decided I was not going to cry. I wouldn't cry anymore. The last time I cried, would be that last night.

"You know, through your ugly torn dress I can almost see your panties so I suggest you change before that rag becomes even worse."

That was when I knew my face was bright, neon red. I quickly spun around and stared at him, wide-eyed.

"Get out you pervy stupid brat!" I yelled, as loud as I thought I could.

"Alright, alright." Toshiro said, walking outside into the first room. He looked so confident about it, like he had just won a bet. I crouched down and processed what had happened.

That brat was going to pay, I was going to show him. He would regret what he had done… I would kill him for that! Anger bubbled inside me, slowly boiling to its peak. I quickly changed into the kimono and stomped out into the first room.

"You brat…" I said, swearing my voice was creepy as hell. I was still staring at my feet. I slowly looked up but, before I could see Toshiro I heard him speak.

"You actually look kinda nice I guess…"

I ran back into the second room.

"Well she's a lively one" the lady said.

* * *

We all laid down on futons. When I first touched the soft fluffy material, I couldn't believe it was real. Before then, I always slept on the ground, usually just dirt. If I wasn't feeling well I would be allowed to sleep on the table.

"This is… amazing…" I whispered.

"You haven't seen a pillow before? How pathetic." I heard Toshiro say behind me.

"It's not my fault I lived in a terrible district!" I yelled at him. I pulled the blankets over me and brought my legs close to my chest. He aggravated me so much! I could feel heat surging to my head.

"You know, my friend Momo entered the Academy this year." Toshiro said. I turned around to face him. He was sleeping to my left and his grandmother to on his left.

"That's cool. I'll make sure I say hi for you." I said trying to restrain from giggling. His face scrunched up when I mentioned it.

"Why would I want to say hi to her!" He yelled in response. I laughed under my breath and turned to face the wall, away from Toshiro. I heard him turn around and pull the blanket closer to him. I smiled and closed my eyes. For the first time, I felt completely safe.


	5. Chapter 5

Hey everyone! Sorry for the wait, I was on vacation without my laptop ^-^. I was really surprised when I came back at all the views, thank you all so much! Also, if you have questions or want to know when new chapters are coming out, feel free to message me or follow my instagram; xxchantallllxx.

Hope you all like this chapter and feel free to give me suggestions for the story!

 **Chapter 5: Unexpected**

"Thank you so much!" I said, lowering, my head to bow.

"Come back anytime, maybe during your break you could come visit us." Said the lady.

"Alright, that would be nice." I smiled, "Thank you."

"Well, I don't want you to come back, ugly urchin!" I heard Toshiro say. I jerked my head to look at him. That disrespectful brat.

"Well I hope you're not here when I come visit granny! Stupid brat." I yelled, my anger escaping me.

Granny laughed silently, the two of us looked at her. A smile spread across my face. After a few moments, I caught myself giggling with her. I enjoyed this happiness, this was one of the best moments of my life. I felt like I didn't have a care in the world.

"I should get going, I guess. Thank you for the kimono and the place to sleep." I said before I ran off.

"Goodbye Chana! Come visit us." I heard granny saying as I got further from the two.

"Hope you fail your classes, ugly urchin!" Toshiro called. I smiled, running even faster towards the entrance doors, the two slowly disappearing out of sight.

After a while, I stopped running. I peered down at the ground and grinned at the purple and red kimono and sandals Granny gave me before I left. A white and purple spotted pattern adorned the side of the kimono and came across the front. It was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen and my life, and by far the most comfortable. Compared to the soft fabric of the kimono, my old dress felt like an old bag made of straw.

I smiled as I skipped along to where the Academy entrance was located. Before long, the wall came into sight. I could see the door in the distance and sprinted towards it. When I arrived, I could hardly believe the size of the door. It soared above me and it felt like it was about to fall onto me.

"Who are you?" asked a black clothed soul reaper.

"Oh, I'm here to become a soul reaper…" I said, shyness overwhelming me. The reality of the situation dawned on me and filled me with nerves. My mouth became dry. I looked up at the soul reaper.

"The entrance exams for this year have already happened, scram kid."

"But, Yamamoto told me to become a soul reaper." I said nervously, tilting my head so my hair covered the sides of my face.

"The Head Captain wouldn't tell a little brat like you to become a soul reaper." I snarled. His tone was harsh, it felt like it was ripping my mind apart. I had the urge to strangle him. I stepped forward one step, my eyes focused on him, ready to stab him.

"That's enough!"

I looked up, I smiled when I saw him.

"Head Captain Sir!" said the rude soul reaper. He and. I stood there, a small smile appearing on my face.

"Kurokawa, Chana. You are to follow me." Yamamoto said, his familiar deep voice calming me for the first time. I followed him through the large doors, they closed slowly behind me. A large building came into view past a large floor.

I looked down to the ground while we walked. The shiny tiles reflected the sun and lit up the large floor. We stepped through another set of doors, these smaller than the ones earlier. Passing the second set, a large building came into full view.

I gasped at the sight. The building soared above me, taller than the first set of doors. We entered the building and I was lead to a middle-sized room. The light blue walls reflected on the wooden floors. The doors shut behind us.

"I assume you have decided to enter the academy." Yamamoto stated.

"Yes sir." I replied, raising my head high and looked straight at the man in front of me.

"Your decision is quite favorable. You are now accepted into the Soul Reaper Academy!" Yamamoto looked down at my small ten-year old body.

"Thank you sir but, don't I need to take a test or something?" I asked, confused.

"You have been excused from the entrance exam." He stated, his deep voice booming throughout the room, "If you failed the exam and went back to the Rukongai, you might have destroyed even more peaceful districts and that would have been a worse outcome."

"Thank you sir." I said, bowing. I was happy and excited about being accepted right away but, the part about burning down peaceful districts worried me.

A soul reaper entered from a second door, located to my left. He held a sword in both his hands, presenting it to Yamamoto. They both bowed and the sword was passed to me. I looked at it in my hands, the grey sheath reflected the light slightly.

"This is an ausachi. Eventually, it will become your zanpakuto. Treat it with care."

"Yes sir!"

"Your classes shall start tomorrow." He said, "I will send someone to show you to your room."

"Thank you so much." I grinned. Yamamoto walked out of the room through the door on my left, leaving me alone in the bright space. I was so happy, I was finally going to have a purpose, I was going to make friends and finally, I would please my family. I hugged the katana.

* * *

"This is where you will be staying." Said a girl wearing an Academy uniform, "There are a couple uniforms in the drawer and information about the school on the desk."

The room was small but, it was so much nicer than anything I had ever seen before. It was about the size of my family's entire one room house and had a real futon in the corner. I ran inside and looked around at the delicately made desk and armoire. They looked like they were carefully crafted by hand.

"Thank you." I said to the girl as I laid down on top of the futon. The cushiony bed was like a large cloud. It reminded me of Granny and Toshiro's house, the first time I ever saw a futon. I smiled and covered my face in my pillow.

I stood up and sat at my new desk. The chair was wooden, it was a little hard but, still somewhat comfortable. A few papers laid on the table. The first had a chart with the title "Class 2. Kurokawa Chana." Inside the chart, I was excited to see a list of Kido classes, combat classes. I squealed in excitement. I almost fell of my chair.

The next morning, I woke up refreshed. The golden sun peeked through the window in my room illuminating the space gradually. I pushed the blankets aside and stood up.

"Where am I?" I asked aloud, still half-asleep. I looked around the room, confused. I walked towards the window and opened the curtains. The brightness of the morning burning my eyes. I fell back in shock and landed on my arm, the hard wooden floor smacking against my skin. I moaned in pain as a small bruise formed on my forearm. Dammit.

"Kurokawa-san!" Said a voice from outside the door. "Are you awake?"

"Uh, yes!" I said in shock. I then realized where I was. I had class. I was probably late.

"Classes are beginning shortly so I am here to escort you to the classroom, seeing as you are new and don't know the Academy well."

"Oh, um, alright! I'm, um, getting ready now!" I said, running to the armoire in panic. It was my first day and I was going to be late.

I ripped the uniform out of the wooden piece of furniture and quickly put it on, unsure if it was put on correctly. Darting to the corner of the rectangular room, I grabbed my ausachi and shuffled to the door. I placed my hand on the handle and took a deep breath. This was it. The beginning of becoming a soul reaper.

I slid the door open to see a woman in a soul reaper uniform. She bowed down to me, I did the same.

"Hello Kurokawa-san!" She said in a cheerful but serious tone, "My name is Hanae Yamaguchi."

"Hi." I said, not knowing what else to say. She already knew my name so it would be awkward to tell her that. I never talked to anyone other than my family, I had no clue how to talk to people.

Hanae smiled and walked down the hall. I followed her. Her short auburn hair didn't reach her shoulders. It moved slightly whenever she took a step. I could see her zanpakuto on her side. It was still grey like the ausachi so I assumed she hadn't learned it's name yet.

We walked in silence across the building. She never looked back at me. We walked further and further away from my room, nervousness welled inside me like before, when Yamamoto was in my district, like someone had hollowed out my stomach.

"Yamaguchi-san, how much further is the class?" I asked quietly, partially hoping she wouldn't hear me.

"It's just up ahead," she said, "Are you nervous?"

I was surprised at her comment, I felt like she was reading my mind. I mumbles a yes under my breath. She giggled and stopped walking. She crouched down to meet my face.

"It's alright to be nervous, I was when it was my first day." She said. I nodded and smiled. Hanae stood up and knocked on the doors. A tall man, also wearing a soul reaper uniform, opened them and welcomed us in a disappointing-sounding tone.

"Thank you Yamaguchi-san, please follow me Kurokawa-san." He told us. Hanae bowed and walked away, winking at me before she disappeared around the corner.

I walked into the classroom with my head held high, trying to contain my excitement. I was finally going to make my father proud, my whole family happy. I was going to change everything.

"This is Chana Kurokawa. She will be joining us from now on so please try and make her feel welcome." Said the man. He turned to me.

"My name is Tanaka-sensei, I will be your teacher." He said in a serious tone. His short dark hair never moved, his face was serious. I could slowly start feeling a menacing presence about him, like he was looming over me and judging me. I felt cornered, even though we were in a large room.

"Please take your seat in the back of the classroom." He ordered. As I turned to face the other students, the feeling worsened. I immediately felt sick, the complete opposite of what I expected from today. I took a step towards the desks. That's when I heard the murmuring.

"Why is she joining our class so late?"

"I heard she didn't even take the exam, they just let her in!"

"What a cheat, I filed that three times and she didn't even take it once!"

"Apparently she's the delinquent from District 79 who burnt it down."

"Seriously, she's the one who thought it would be fun to kill all those people?"

"Why would they let someone like her in here, she's going to kill us all!"

"Shut up, she's passing us we don't want her to hear!"

"Who fucking cares! She'll be kicked out soon for murder or something anyways so why bother?"

I kept my head down. I watched my feet walk towards the back of the room. Why were they accusing me like this? Why were they saying I wanted to do this? They didn't know me… Why did they all hate me?

I reached the back of the classroom and looked around for a seat. The only one was beside a black-haired girl who wasn't paying attention to me. She glared at the rest of her classmates, I could see her eyes stabbing them like daggers. She scared me, I didn't want her to hurt me. But, she was the only person I could sit beside.

"Um, would it be alright if I sit here?" I asked her, hoping she would say yes but no at the same time.

"Yes of course." She said, still glaring at the others, who were now laughing and looking at me in brief intervals.

"Thank you" I whispered, pulling the chair back and sitting in it. I was much smaller than everyone else so, I could hardly see over the people in front of me. I was almost too short to even see over the desk.

I could hear the teacher saying something but could not make out what it was. I hugged my ausachi and lifted my legs up to my chest. This would be a very long six years, and I wasn't looking forward to it anymore.


	6. Chapter 6

I know this chapter is kinda short and not as good as the others... I'm sorryyyyy ;_; Hope you like it anywayssss :D I might not be posting for a bit because my computer decided to delete the next chapter so now I have to do it ALL over again and I'm so sad ;_; Very very sad... Hopefully the views/ visitors etc. will inspire me to finish quickly. x) It was going to be such a good chapterrrrr, now I have to try and remember what I wrote... ;_; *cries alone in a corner*

Instagram: xxchantallllxx

 **Chapter 6: Happy Times**

The first class had ended. I had no idea what I was taught, I couldn't even hear anything from my seat, let alone understand it. I started regretting joining, I didn't want to be a soul reaper if it meant having to go through this every day. I had no idea it would get even worse than that.

I slipped out of my chair and tried to reach the exit undetected. When I got up, I tried not to look at anyone so I could slip past my classmates. Unfortunately, they were all looking at me.

"Hey little girl. You know it's not very nice to set things on fire." One person said.

"Well, it's understandable, she _is_ just a dog from a lowly district." Another stated, grabbing on to my arm.

"Please stop." I said, still avoiding eye contact with anyone.

"Is the little child uncomfortable?" said another voice, "What a brat."

"You shouldn't even be here, you're only a kid."

The insults kept coming. I could see a few people duck out of the classroom with awkward expressions, like they didn't want to get involved. They seemed worried but, didn't want to mess with the situation.

The guy holding my arm pulled it back, making it feel like my arm was tearing off. I whimpered, the pain was making my arm numb. I gripped my sword tightly in my other hand, holding it more and more tightly as the pain grew larger. I could hardly take it.

"Hey! What do you think you're doing! Leave her alone!" said a voice from behind. I turned to see who it was. The girl I sat beside earlier stood tall in the aisle between desks.

"What are you going to do about it?" snarled one of the guys. He looked about eighteen with dark blonde hair that was cut fairly short. He walked up to the girl and looked down at her. She was much shorter than he was and looked quite a few years younger.

"No stop, don't involve her! She did nothing!" I cried, hoping I wouldn't cause any more problems. The one person who didn't make fun of me, I couldn't make her hate me too.

"Shut up pyro." Said the blond, looking back at me for an instant.

The girl turned away from him and walked towards me. She ripped of the hand that was holding me and pulled me away from the crowd. She held my arm until we were outside the classroom.

"Thank you…" I said to her in a hushed tone. She let go of my arm and turned to face me. Her purple eyes stared me down. I looked at her flat expression, like she was serious or angry. Maybe it was a mistake to thank her, or to sit with her in the first place…

"You have to learn to stick up for yourself." She stated, her voice bolder than earlier, "All those kids from noble families or better districts don't understand where we come from. So, we need to learn to show them that we aren't some trash that can be stepped on!"

My eyes widened in surprise, I couldn't say anything. All I could do was nod slightly, small breaths escaping me. I was thankful she wasn't going to beat me up herself.

"My name is Rukia. I am from District 78 of South Rukon." She said, "Let's be friends."

* * *

A couple weeks had gone by, Rukia and I had become good friends. She was always there for me when someone tried to mock me for my past. She never asked me about what had happened, it was like she didn't care at all. When we spent time together, it felt like the fire had never happened. She was my first true friend.

I was glad to have someone to relate to, no one in the Academy understood what we went through in our districts. They all had food, shelter and didn't have to fear for their lives. For us, this was the first time we truly felt safe and calm. I was glad I wasn't the only person who felt like this.

One day, Rukia and I were walking to a class when we ran into someone yelling Rukia's name down the long wooden hall. I looked over at her, puzzled. She sighed and looked down, shaking her head. I looked back at the guy, he stood in front of us panting. He seemed really out of shape.

"Hey Rukia! I haven't seen you in a while how have you been?" He asked, "I just passed our latest combat test with a perfect score! Isn't that amazing?"

"Yes, that's great Renji." Rukia said.

"Who is this?" He asked, pointing directly at my face.

"My name's Chana Kurokawa." I said, looking up at him. He had red hair that was tied up and spiked out around his head. He had weird tattoos for eyebrows that stretched up to his forehead. I had never seen anything like it.

"Oh, hi I'm Renji Abarai! Nice to meet you Kurokawa-san!" He said as he bowed. I did the same and smiled. I laughed slightly, his hyperness was amusing.

"You don't have to call me that," I giggled, "I'll just be Chana."

"Alright!" He said, smiling. We all started laughing. I hated when people called me by my last name, it reminded me of my family and made me realize that they were gone forever, that I was the only Kurokawa left.

Nonetheless, things were looking up at that point. I wish it could have always been like that. Laughing, making friends, not caring about anything at all. Peace like that never lasts for long but, I was enjoying every minute I got to spend with them.

"Renji! Why did you run away all of a sudden!?" It was a girl. She and another student ran towards us.

"Oh hey guys." He said when they caught up to him. Both of them wore the student uniforms, one red and one blue. The girl wore her short dark hair in pigtails while the boy had light blonde hair. They both put their hands on their knees and panted.

I looked at Renji then Rukia, trying to get one of them to tell me who these people were.

"See, it's obviously because of Rukia. That's the only reason he'd go running down the hall." Said the boy, "Or maybe it's because of this new friend of his."

I looked at him, I swear I started blushing in embarrassment. I wanted to tell him he was wrong, that I just met him and I was definitely not going to be someone he runs to. I couldn't say anything.

"Oh this is just Chana, she's Rukia's new friend." Renji told them like it was no big deal. It annoyed me how he treated me like I was nothing, right after he met me! I felt like yelling at him but, I had no idea what to say. So, I just kept quiet, trying to keep my frustration bottled up.

"It's nice to meet you!" Said the boy, "My name is Izuru Kira."

"I'm Momo Hinamori." Added the girl. I was glad these people were nice, it looked like I had gained a few new friends. I smiled. I was finally happy again.

Suddenly, a realization hit me. I looked over at Momo and recalled memories of before I entered the academy. It was definitely her, it had to be.

"You're Toshiro's friend!" I yelled, pointed at Momo, who then gasped in a confused tone.

"How do you know Shiro?" She asked, cocking her head.

"I met him and Granny just before I came to the Academy. Toshiro was a brat but Granny was nice and gave me food and let me sleep at her house for the night." I told her.

"Toshiro's so annoying." She stated, "He's always making fun of me."

"He called me an Ugly Urchin!" I yelled, "I'm glad I don't have to see him anymore!"

Momo and I laughed, the others stood beside us, confused. I liked conversations like these, they were always relaxing and eased my pain little by little. The first month at the Academy started out terribly but, meeting Rukia, Renji and the others made my life better. I smiled, this was what I had wanted from the beginning, friends I could have fun with and depend on. It was all getting better. I was happy.


	7. Chapter 7

**Hey everyone! Sorry for the very very long wait! I really have no excuse except that I didn't feel like writing. I'll try not to make chapters this far apart without warning again. Hopefully you like this chapter, it isn't as good as the other one I wrote... ;_;**

 **Instagram: xxchantallllxx**

 **Twitter :xxchantalllllxx**

 _ **UPDATE 09/06/2016:**_

 **I decided to add more to this chapter instead of posting it with the new chapter because it would sound odd and wouldn't fit in the new chapter. Sorry for the confusion ;)**

 **Chapter 7: Shakkaho**

"Kurokawa-san, please go next" Tanaka-sensei said.

This was the first time I got to participate in kido class. Before, I was always told to sit out and learn the different Kido. All the other students glanced at me occasionally, giving me pitiful and mocking gazes. It embarrassed me to be forced to be the only one not participating, it made me think about how bad I was compared to everyone. They all had a month of practice before me so, I was determined to perform the kido flawlessly. I wanted to prove I was as capable as everyone else.

"Yes sir!" I said, standing up and standing in front of a target. It was a few meters away from where I was standing, it seemed manageable to hit. I looked at the small circle in the center, my hands started shaking. I could feel nervousness crash over me like a tsunami. I was never nervous before or when I thought about finally being able to try.

"Please show us Hado number 31 Kurokawa-san." Tanaka-sensei stated.

"Right!" I said. I took a deep breath and put my hands out in front of me, just like everyone else had.

"Ye lord! Mask of blood and flesh, all creation, flutter of wings, ye who bears the name of Man! Inferno and pandemonium, the sea barrier surges, march on to the south!" I yelled, "Hado 31, Shakkaho!"

I closed my eyes as the bright ball of red flew from my hands, hurling towards the target. A loud bang resonated from the impact, I heard a few screams from behind me as a burst of wind knocked me over. With that sound, the nervousness grew more frightening.

I slowly looked towards the target to see a large crater where the wall used to be. All the targets were gone, no trace of them was left. I noticed a few students standing on the other side of where the wall used to be. They didn't move, only stood there, staring at the destruction.

I slowly looked around me, my classmates had the same reactions on their faces as the other students. No one spoke, no one moved. So much for impressing them. So much for a flawless performance.

I slowly turned my head around, the only area damaged was where the target was. Thankfully, I didn't hurt anyone. The only rubble was near the destruction and in the area between us and it. As relief started to flood in that I didn't hurt anyone, it immediately disappeared.

"Kurokawa-san!" I heard Tanaka-sensei say behind me, "Follow me right now!"

All eyes focused on me. I stood up slowly, embarrassment washing over me. I took a step towards the door, where Tanaka-sensei was waiting with an angered expression plastered on his face. Every step felt like I was getting stabbed by a dagger, like every stare pierced my soul. I could have sworn I looked as uncomfortable as I felt.

When I finally reached the hallway, I could hear murmuring on the other side of the door. The judgements and tormenting would begin once again. My life would become Hell once again. I was not looking forward to stepping back inside.

"Kurokawa-san! I told you not to use all your energy in a kido attack! You have to lower your output!"

"I did sir, I did exactly as you told me. I only released a small amount!"

"Do not talk back to me!"

He continued yelling. People passed us in the halls with worried looks on their faces. No one helped me. No one even hinted to me that it would be alright. They all quietly sped up when they reached us until they were out of sight. I was all alone.

The insults kept coming. Every "It wasn't correct!" or "You can't even preform a simple kido properly!" lowered my confidence until it was nothing but a memory. Each word of disapproval felt like being shot until I was left for dead. I didn't even know what I did wrong, I did everything he told me to. I tried so hard.

"I'm sorry sir, I'll try harder next time." I said, looking down in disappointment and embarrassment.

"If there is a next time! You might be kicked out for damaging the school. You should have waited until next year to join, you are holding everyone back. They won't be able to practice anymore because you broke the training room!" He shouted, "You should leave the academy, go back to that poor district you came from. Wait until next year and take the test like a normal student. For now go back to your room so I can clean this up, you are dismissed for today."

He went back inside the room. I was alone in the hall, trying to hold back tears. Even the teachers treated me like I was worthless garbage. I thought the teachers would at least keep their personal feelings to themselves. But they were the same as everyone else. Tanaka-sensei didn't want anything to do with me at all.

As I walked away, I heard yelling inside the classroom. He must have been warning everyone not to do the same or telling them what would happen if they did. I left it all behind as I started running faster down the hallway.

My sadness and embarrassment turned into frustration and anger. I hated them all. They all made fun of me when I was weak, made my miserable life even worse than before. I wanted to break down another wall, I wanted to burn the academy down like I did with my district. I wanted them all to feel the pain I did…

My pace quickened with every thought. My footsteps echoed throughout the wooden building. I passed many other students who gasped when I sped past them. It felt like my room was miles away. All I wanted was to hide alone for eternity.

I looked away for one moment when I ran into someone. I fell down, my ausachi flew across the floor. I looked up to see a familiar face.

"Renji!" I said, still confused about what just happened.

"Are you alright Chana? Don't you have a class right now?" He asked.

"I… I was let out early!" I said. I didn't want him to know what happened. If he didn't know, he wouldn't judge me like everyone else. I could avoid conflict for a little while longer.

"Are you sure? You seem a bit… angry…"

"I said I'm fine! I'm just going back to my room." I said, trying to get past him.

"What happened?" He asked, grabbing onto my arm.

"Don't touch me!" I yelled. All my anger was focused towards him. He looked at me with concern, his eyes wide. He was getting really irritating. All I wanted was to be alone, why was he stopping me? I struggled to escape his grip, he wouldn't let go not matter how much I tried.

"Let go Renji!" I said.

"Not until you tell me what's wrong, I'm getting worried!" He said, gripping more tightly.

"I'm fine!" I focused on his hand, trying to get my arm free. My anger grew stronger and stronger. I did not want to deal with this.

"Ow! What did you do that for? Your arm was like burning!" Renji exclaimed jerking his hand away and waving it frantically in the air.

"I'm sorry!"

I ran away.

* * *

"Kurokawa Chana! Open the door! You have been summoned by Head Captain Yamamoto!" A voice from outside my door stated.

I didn't want to go. I was sitting in the corner of my room, clutching my sword. It had been two days since the incident. I didn't go back to class in fear of seeing Tanaka-sensei or other students. No one understood what my life was like, they never would.

"Kurokawa-san, if you do not come out, we will come in and get you."

I stood up slowly and walked over to the door. My shaking hand pushed open the door. There was no point in resisting. Might as well get it over with. A male soul reaper stood, waiting for me. He immediately led me down hallways and through new rooms I had never visited.

As we walked down, I grew nervous, thinking about the reason why I was being summoned. Were they going to throw me out? Was Yamamoto going to do it personally? Were they going to make me pay for the wall? Would I have to rebuild it? The only reasons I could think of were bad, which made me regret leaving my room more and more.

We reached a large door that I had never encountered before. The soul reaper opened it and dropped to his knee.

"I have brought Kurokawa Chana, Head Captain!" He said.

I looked around the room. It was very large with a transparent wall dividing it in two sections, the smaller one was where I stood and the larger area was empty. Standing in front of me was Yamamoto, a soul reaper I did not know and Tanaka-sensei. I tried not to look at him.

"Kurokawa-san, I apologize for the events that occurred earlier this week. I hope they did not cause too much trouble." Yamamoto said, "We called you here today to ask you to perform the kido again, but without trying to restrain from using all your power."

"Alright." I said, trying to look confident. I was nervous, not only because I had to present something I had little practice with in front of both Tanaka-sensei and Yamamoto but, because I didn't understand why

I was led to the clear wall. It looked like it was made of glass or some type of see-through plastic. I never had windows at home, they all broke and were replaced with wooden planks. A small gap appeared in front of me when I reached it.

"Aim through this hole and towards the wall on the other side of the room." Tanaka-sensei instructed.

I looked ahead of me, still questioning what they were trying to prove. I knew I did it wrong before, why were they trying to make me feel even more sorry for myself? Why were they trying to prove I was inexperienced and weak?

"Ye lord! Mask of blood and flesh, all creation, flutter of wings, ye who bears the name of Man! Inferno and pandemonium, the sea barrier surges, march on to the south!" I said, "Hado 31, Shakkaho!"

I focused all my feelings into the blazing red ball as I shot it through the gap in the wall. It flew toward the other side of the room, faster than the one in class, and created a blinding red light. I covered my eyes, shielding it from the brightness. When I opened them, I gasped.

The wooden walls around us were completely blown away. All that was left was the transparent box we stood in. A few fires were scattered across the landscape, proving that it was my Shakkaho that destroyed the building.

I pressed my hands on the wall to get a better view of the destruction I had caused. The whole area was barren. All I could see was the school in the far distance, I hadn't realized we walked so far.

"That settles it." A voice boomed across the small box we were in, presumably a barrier, "The actions taken earlier by Tanaka-san were irrational and unneeded. We have proven that you have great control over your spiritual energy as the damage in the classroom and here today are much different in magnitude. You possess a very large amount of spiritual energy, therefore when you were told to reduce it by a certain percentage, that percentage still contained a lot of energy. You are not at fault."

I glanced over at Tanaka-sensei. He looked away immediately, not even allowing a second of eye contact. I wasn't surprised. His actions were proven wrong and immoral. He could have even lost his job.

"You will continue to progress with the classmates you have been with so far and if we notice you have been improving, we will consider changing your position. You have the potential to become a great soul reaper but, you will have to work hard for it. Do your best Chana." Yamamoto stated before he took his wooden cane and walked out the side of the transparent room.


	8. Chapter 8

**Hi everyone! I'm honestly so excited, I have over 1200 views! xD I am honestly so overwhelmed, I remember how excited I was when I got my first view. Now, I honestly can't believe that this has happened. Thank you all so much for your support!**

 **If you haven't read the update on Chapter 7, please go see it. It would be a bit of a pain if a bunch of people messaged me saying; "Where's the end of the last chapter?" or "What happened with the last chapter?" xD**

 **I will be posting updates and planned release dates on my new Twitter more than my Instagram, it's easier to send out information there. So, go follow if you want these updates! xxchantalllllxx (5 l's ;))**

 **Comments, suggestions, ideas for future chapters are always welcome and much appreciated! Give me your input so I can improve my story for all of you! ;D**

 **Enjoy! x)**

 **Chapter 8: Returning**

Time passed. Life went on as usual. I got used to the classes and made a couple friends I could talk to if I was alone. Most of the time though, I spent with Rukia, Renji, Izuru and Momo. We had become good friends throughout the couple months I had spent with them. We often went out at night to the stores and spent time together during the lunch breaks, laughing and making fun of each other. I felt like I could trust them.

After about three months together in the academy, I was told there was going to be a two week-long break to go visit our homes and family. This news made my heart sink. I had nowhere to go. Even if I did want to go back to my district, I would be able to make it there and back in that little time.

It was a couple days before the break and Rukia and I met up with Renji, Momo and Izuru. The conversations started out as they usually did, someone would explain something that happened, someone would do something stupid and we would all laugh.

"I'm really excited for the break. It will be fun to see Shiro, he's probably been causing trouble as usual." Momo laughed.

"Renji and I think it would be nice to visit or district, this might be our last chance for a while so I'd like to get there, at least for a day." Rukia explained. I understood how she felt. I didn't want to go back to my home because of all the pain it caused but, it would be nice to visit once more before I decided not to go back again.

"Where are you going, Chana? You still haven't told us." Izuru asked. I just looked down at my hands.

"I'm just going to stay here. I don't really have anywhere to go…" I said.

"Seriously? You want to stay at school on your break from school?" Renji shouted.

"Well, I don't want to go home and I don't know where else I would go…"

"Oh, I'm sorry Chana. If you want you could come with us, but I'm not sure it would be much fun…" Rukia said.

"It's alright. I don't mind staying…"

"Why don't you come with me?" I looked up at Momo, staring at me, "You already know Shiro and Grandma, I'm sure they would welcome you!"

"It's alright, I'd probably get in the way anyways." I said, looking back down. It was for the best. I didn't want to burden them all of a sudden.

"Come on Chana! You have to!" Renji shouted.

"It would be much more fun than staying here alone." Izuru added.

"Chana, you have to come with me! I'm sure Shiro would like to see you." Momo said, smiling.

"Well, I don't want to see him! I'll be fine here" I said, looking away in defiance.

"You are going with her whether you want to or not!" Rukia yelled, pointing straight at me. My eyes widened and I looked at her, shocked. No one said anything. Laughter broke the silence.

Renji's echoing chuckle quickly spread. Soon, we were all laughing. Laughing at the littlest of things. But, it made us happy. We started to become like a family. We all started trusting each other and relying on one another. We were happy together, they were the best friends I could ever had.

* * *

"Bye everyone!" I waved as Rukia, Renji and Izuru parted ways with us. Only Momo and I remained at the gates that afternoon. Since we were already in the district where Toshiro and Momo grew up, we didn't have that far to walk.

We started towards the area. I wore the same kimono Granny had given me. The deep purple sleeves were still a bit long, they hid the palms of my hands when I had them at my sides.

"Chana, what made you decide to go to the academy? You never really told us the reason." Momo asked, not making eye contact with me.

"I guess… It's for my family… They died…" I said nervously. I had completely forgotten about the fact I needed to keep my past a secret. If I didn't, they would all think I was a monster like everyone else. The rumors about what happened when I arrived had slowly disappeared. Nobody believed I caused the fire. I wanted to keep it that way, so I wouldn't have to go through the pain of being feared and hated like before.

"Oh, I'm sorry." She said.

"It's alright," I smiled, "Besides, if that didn't happen I probably wouldn't be here with you guys. I'm glad I got to meet all of you so that pain is slowly fading."

"Well I guess that's good." She said, "Oh, there's the house."

I watched Momo point towards the building I left a few months before. It looked the same as earlier. The sun peeked out from behind the wooden roof. It was almost evening, we made it just in time before the darkness swallowed the skies.

I stood behind Momo as she opened the door. I slowly peeked inside where I saw Granny and Toshiro sitting in the middle of the room. It seemed like they had just finished eating. Empty bowls sat in front of them.

"I'm back guys! Guess who I brought with me!" Momo grabbed my arm and pulled me into the room. My eyes immediately met Toshiro's teal gaze.

"Why hello Chana! It's nice to see you again!" Granny said, snapping my attention away from Toshiro.

"Hi Granny. It's nice to see you too." I smiled.

"Will you be staying with us this time?" She asked. Her soft and gentle voice felt familiar, even if I had only met her once. It was calming and welcoming. It made me feel less nervous when I was anxious before I left for the academy and made me feel at home now that I had returned.

"If you don't mind, I would like to." I said quietly, "There's nowhere else I would go during the break…"

"Of course! You're always welcome here." She said, "Let's get some futons for you two."

Momo and I followed Granny into the other room, which looked exactly the same as when I visited for the first time. Two futons laid on the ground, shelves stood against the walls, a small window like a painting of the glowing sunset illuminating the room. That visit made the house feel more like a home.

"Hey Momo! Do you guys want food?" I turned to see Toshiro yelling through the doorway. At that moment, I realized we hadn't eaten anything for hours. The last time had some food was that morning, I completely skipped lunch.

"I'm not hungry, ask Chana." Momo said. Toshiro immediately looked at me. I froze in place. I couldn't talk. His eyes met mine once again. I had never realized how perfect they looked before that moment, the calming teal colour was different than anything I ever saw.

"Chana? Hello? Are you dead?" Toshiro waved at me. I immediately snapped out of my trance and dismissed the thoughts I was having.

"Sure, I'll have some." I said.

I followed him into the first room where he handed me a bowl with the same noodle soup as before. We went to sit down at the short table in the middle of the room.

"So, how have you been lately?" I asked Toshiro, who sat in front of me, looking out a window beside the front door.

"That's none of your business, ugly urchin." He replied, childishly sticking his tongue out at me.

"Wow, I'm just trying to talk to you, stupid brat!" I yelled.

"Well, I don't want to talk to you!" He said, standing up and walking away. I was alone with my soup. Why was he acting like that? It was like he didn't want anything to do with me, even more than the last time…

* * *

"Goodnight everyone. Sleep well." Granny said as she blew out the candle, the only light source left in the night-filled room.

I laid close to the wall, Toshiro beside me, then Momo beside him and Granny on the end. Toshiro wouldn't even turn to look in my direction, he only faced Momo. I started worrying, did I do something wrong? I thought he was joking when he said he didn't want me to come back. What happened these past few months?

I looked up at the ceiling pondering what went wrong. It felt like hours had past, I still couldn't come up with an answer. I slowly dozed off, still worried about Toshiro's actions. Deep down, I actually wanted to be friends with him, I wanted him to like me, not hate me… I just wanted friends to care about…


	9. Chapter 9

**Twitter: xxchantalllllxx**

 **Chapter 9: The Feeling of Betrayal**

"Why don't the two of you go buy some food for dinner tonight?" Momo said, passing by Toshiro and I. She was holding a couple boxes, helping Granny move them.

"Why both of us?" Toshiro said from behind me, "I'd rather just go alone."

It had been two days since Momo and I arrived, Toshiro wanted nothing to do with me since that moment. He avoided doing anything with me, it hardly looked like he wanted to be in the same room as me. I had no idea what was wrong.

"Well, I'm making you go together. You have said nothing to each other this whole trip." Momo declared, walking away, "Grandma left some money on the table."

We sat in silence for a few moments. I glanced over at Toshiro who was looking away from me with a serious look on his face. His eyes were focused to where he was looking and his face was partially scrunched up as if in frustration. I knew he wasn't happy with the situation. I turned to look in front of me again.

"Well, let's go." Toshiro said in an annoyed tone, walking up beside me.

"Oh, alright…" I said, standing up to join him.

I followed him in silence as we walked into town. The street was busy and full of cheerful vendors. Smiling, laughing, chatting. Bright signs hung in front of the small stores. I saw Toshiro walk up to one. I stood beside him.

Vegetables of all different kinds adorned the walls of the stall. It was more food than I had ever seen in my life. I gazed in amazement, all the colours created a rainbow of deliciousness. I wanted to try everything.

"What do you want?" I heard Toshiro ask, looking at me. I immediately snapped out of my trance.

"It doesn't really matter, it all looks good." I smiled. His clam gaze turned serous in a matter of seconds.

"Pick something! It's not that hard!" He yelled.

"Oh… Well… Um…"

"You're hopeless!" He growled. He sighed and turned to the vendor, "We'll get bags of cabbage, carrots, potatoes, leeks and daikon."

I had never heard of most of the things we bought but soon enough, we were carrying a bunch of bags back to the house. As we walked, I noticed people looking away as we passed by. I looked at Toshiro, who had the same expression on as before we left. He looked as if he was in pain or sad about something that had happened.

"Why does everyone look like they are avoiding us?" I asked.

"It's none of your business, just ignore them." He replied, his expression becoming more noticeable.

"Why won't you tell me?" I asked, pressing harder for answers.

"It's nothing just stop asking!" He yelled.

"It can't be nothing, what's the reason?" I yelled back.

"I told you to stop!" He yelled as he turned around, swinging the back at my face. I narrowly dodged it.

"What the hell! What was that for?" I yelled. I felt more betrayed than angry, it felt like he was shutting me out for no reason at all. I thought we were actually friends. I wanted to be friends…

"I told you to stop asking! It doesn't even matter to you, soon you'll leave and you won't come back!"

He ran away. I stood in shock, something happened to him that I didn't know about. He was keeping it to himself. He disappeared around the corner, leaving me alone with three bags of vegetables.

* * *

"Don't worry Chana, he'll be back to normal soon." Momo said as we made soup with some of the vegetables bought earlier.

"Alright… I just feel like I did something wrong…" I said.

"I'm sure it's nothing, maybe he's just mad at the people of the town again. They are scared of him for some reason, I'm not quite sure why."

"Really? That must be hard for him…"

"Sometimes it really gets to him, he doesn't even want to go into town sometimes. Not many people will treat him like every other person they come across…"

"I guess that could be part of it…" I said, "But, I think there's another reason for his behavior since we arrived."

"I'm sure he'll tell you when he's ready." Momo smiled.

"I hope so…"

The soup finished cooking, Momo called Granny and Toshiro inside to eat. We all sat down together, with bowls of soup sitting in front of us. I had never tried potatoes before that soup, not even in the Academy. It looked like a small white box when I picked it out of the bowl. I continued looking at it for a while before finally tasting it.

The flavor it contained was unlike anything I had tasted. The flavor of the broth mixed with the other ingredients was fused perfectly with the starchiness of the potato itself.

"This is delicious!" I said. Granny laughed when I looked up and soon Momo joined in too. The three of us started giggling together. I glanced over at Toshiro whose lips broke into a small smile. He finally seemed a bit happier than when I returned two days before.

* * *

The sun had set, Momo and Granny were both talking in the first room. I laid on my futon in the second. I quietly snuck outside, wanting to look at the stars. The last time I had the chance to see them was in Dakuhiru, with my family. In the Academy, I never had the time to go outside and admire them again.

I could see the town we were in earlier ahead of me, lights illuminating the shops in the distance. When I thought about what had happened, I sighed. My spirit dropped thinking about how Toshiro ran away after I kept pestering him. Waves of shame started to flow over me.

I suddenly heard a rustling from behind me. I quickly turned around, scared something out there would jump out and hurt me. Fortunately, I saw Toshiro lying on the roof of the house.

I slowly walked around the corner and saw a ladder leaning on the side of the building. I put my hand slowly on the rough wooden beam. Step by step I made my way up to the roof. Toshiro was looking up at the stars I gazed at a few moments prior. I slowly moved beside him and laid down. We didn't say a word for what felt like hours.

"I'm sorry for earlier today… I shouldn't have yelled at you." He told me. I looked at the side of his face, his spiky with hair covered the top of it, his vibrant eyes stayed glued to the darkness above.

"It's my fault, I shouldn't have kept asking." I replied. I was the one who caused the argument, I was to blame.

"No it's not. I've been having a hard time lately, I shouldn't have taken my anger out on you in that situation."

"I understand where you are coming from. When my family died, I wanted nothing to do with others. I wanted them all to disappear…"

"Oh, I'm sorry…" He said. The only person I told about their deaths was Momo on our way to visit, no one else even knew my family was dead. I didn't even mind. I wanted to keep my past as far away as possible from the people I cared about at that moment.

"It's alright, I feel better now."

"I'm glad you're fine, it would be sad if you had died with them…" That comment made me jerk my head towards him, it was the first nice thing he said to me in two days. I smiled, he was finally becoming the person I met over three months ago again.

"Thank you."


	10. Chapter 10

Hey guys, sorry I haven't been posting new chapters for this story. Unfortunately, I won't be updating Flame for a while. I'm not sure exactly when I'll continue posting but, I definitely will so don't worry! In the meantime, I am writing a new story about Attack on Titan / Shingeki no Kyojin called Wings with Chana as the main character again. xD This time, I decided to write chapters in advance instead of writing them and then immediately posting (which was really stupid of me because of my terrible procrastination habits x) ). In my new story, chapters are posted every Monday.

Anyways, thank you all so much for reading this far! I really love you guys and I hope you will continue reading when I can post more chapters. :D I really appreciate all your support and comments. Thank you all so much :)

Bye x)


End file.
